New Idea

I have had a few things going on and Ive been super down and I feel like things just keep getting worse.. So I'm kicking things in full gear to get things back on the right track.

I'm on a mission. For 30 days I am going to make sure i do something at least once a day to do something to better myself and my situation.

Finally coming out of my cave.

So much as happened since I last posted. I dont know where to start. Since I dont know where to start I'm just going to talk about my recent headlines.. :-)

Jennah started kindergarten a few weeks ago. So bitter sweet. I'm so proud and excited to see her grow up, it makes me sad to see her grow.. She is my baby and always will be.. I wish her the best of luck in school and I know she will do fantastic.

New Year.....

2011 was a tad too crazy for me.. Went thru so much and I've got to say I am really glad to see it go..

I do have to say that there were a few great things in 2011.. I rekindled with some great people that I had lost contact with.. One is my mother in law.. After Adam and I split we had lost contact. I am SO greatful for her to be back in my life.. I also got back in touch with my GREAT friend Brittany.. SOOO glad to have her back in my life.. Missed her so much.. and I am so glad to be able to be apart of her little ones life..

I really dont know what to think about 2012.. So for its been super crazy and its only been a week.. lol..

On new years day I woke up to a flat tire.. 2 days later my donut blows as Im going down the road.. It was 21 degrees out side, 8am and on a road where nothing is around.. And to top it off I had no phone b/c my phone was turned off a few days prier. I ended up having to walk up to some strange house to see if I could use their phone.. I was so lucky that It ended up being a very sweet couple. They were so nice and helped me out a lot.. With a little drama it all got taken care of.. :-)

So with the New Year here I am ready for new adventures.. Ready to live and move on and put things finally behind me.. Its something that should have been done a long time ago...

Checking In

I havent been on in about a month so I decided to just check in... Within the past month I turned 30..AAAHH 30.. How crazy.. Where did these last 30 years go? LOL.. Well to celebrate I went to Charleston. I stayed with my sister for a few days.. It was great.. That Saturday my neice and nephew had a birthday party. We had SO much fun that weekend.. It was something I needed and It was awesome to see my sister and the family. I just really wish my brother was there also.. He couldnt come down due to work... I really miss him.... :-(

I will post pictures one day this week..

4th of July

I know I have mentioned before on how much I love the 4th of July and this year just reminded me on HOW much I love it.. LOL

I spent the day with Jamie and Gavin.. Swimming and eating super yummy food.. That evening I met up with Adam for the Jennah exchange.. So Jennah, Jamie, Gavin and I went downtown to do the celebrating.. We ate dinner at Wild Wings. Had a snow cone and then walked back to our parking lot to get ready to see the fireworks.. This kids played by the car and around this tree while Jamie and I chatted..

The fireworks came and Jennah did not like them at all.. LOL.. Poor thing kept on telling me that she was scared and wanted to go home.. Besides her being scared they were really good.. We had a great time..

Washing away my stress

I am at Jamie's sitting on her porch which is on the third floor of her apartment building.. Its pouring out and the wind is blowing. OMG this has got to be the best feeling in the world.. No one to bother me, sipping on a cold Dr. Pepper and listening to the rain and thunder with a small touch of wind hitting my toes.. Now I have go to say that Jamie's porch faces trees so it looks like the rain forest out here..Its bliss.. Like I said, I could not be any happier.. If I had a hammick I would being taking a nap right now.. LOL. My stress seems to be washing away with the rain and it feels terrific.

Thank you mother nature for giving me exactly what I needed..

Stressed and Blessed

I tend to complain about a lot of things that happen in my life.. Like the past couple of weeks have been pretty tough on me.. I have had a lot of challenging things happen and then I had some greatful things happen.. Well lets just say the whole month of June was a challenge for me.. June 10th is my wedding anniversary, then June 14th is my divorce anniversary.. I tried to think of those dates as milestones.. See how much I have grown in those years... I honestly couldnt tell you why this year it was so tough.. I really had a hard time dealing with those.. AND on top of all that I fell SO behind on my bills.. Struggling really bad.. So stress with that kinda took over as well.. I ended up with an ear infection that wouldnt seem to go away and since I had so much stress I developed Shingles once again.. So now I am struggling with that. What a pain in the butt... Thesejust an example of what happened this month..

SO, not only did bad things happen I had a few good things that happened.. While struggling with my situations I realized what great friends and family I had.. I had one particular friend that helped me beyond I can imagine.. If it wasnt for her I would be in a huge rutt. So a huge thank you to Jamie.. :-)

I dont know if I have ever mentioned but I LOVE the 4th of July.. Its my ultimate favorite holiday.. I love just about everythign about it.. Friends, Family, cookouts, the smell of cookouts, fireworks, pool, beer, seeing the face on my daughter when she sees the fireworks, and all the red white and blue.. Couldnt have asked for a better holiday...

Happy Father's Day!!!!

I just wanted to leave a short note saying Happy Father's Day to all fathers out there... I'm not that close to my dad but I still love him very much and I wish him a great fathers day.

Today Jennah is going to her daddy's house to spend some time with him.. I feel bad b/c I wasnt able to get him anything but then again oh well..

I do want to talk about my little ones daddy.. What a great daddy.. I do not have one complaint about him when it comes to Jennah.. I tell people all the time that I have the best baby daddy/ex-husband I could have asked for.. He is awesome.. He gets her every weekend and when he is in the area he will stop by to see her.. I know for a fact that she is his sunshine, his life and he loves her very much.. For that I thank God everyday for such a great father for Jennah..

She Cracks Me Up

Jennah always seems to amaze me on how smart she is.. I know that sounds weird but she says off the wall things.. Things I had no clue she even knew about.. For example we were sitting on the couch watching Cops and there was a guy handcuffed and then all of a sudden she say's "Him's going to jail".. I looked at her and was like "OMG what did you just say". She repeated it.. I just started to laugh and I agreed with her and told her that "yes he is going to jail, he was a bad boy and had to go to jail." Like, Seriously does she really know what jail is? I called Adam right away and told him about it.. He just laughed.. He doesnt really remember ever saying anything about jail so theres no telling where she learned that.. It was super cute.

Being the better person, "D" day and Potty Training

Ok, on Saturday I was driving over to Jamies when we passed by Matress Firm.. All of a sudden Jennah is in the back seat repeating Mary's name (Mary is Adam's girlfriend). I looked in the window as I was passing and saw that Mary was sitting at the desk by herself.. I asked Jennah if she wanted to say hi to her and she got all excited and said yes.. So I sighed and said ok.. Well my insides were shaking. I pulled in the parking space and had to just sit there and breathe.. I got Jennah out of the car and walked on in.. I wish everyone could have seen Mary's face.. it was hilarious.. LOL. She said hi and all and Jennah decided to play shy. I stood there and talked to her for about 10 mins about absolutley nothing.. Just trying to make small talk as Jennah played with her and stuff.. When it was over with I got in the car and text Adam right away. The funny thing was that she texted him the same exact time.. She said it was really nice of me and super cute that Jennah wanted to see her... Yeah it was nice of me.. Only if she knew that i was freaking out inside.. But Me as the better person put my feelings aside and let Jennah say hi to her...

So today is the first anniversary of my divorce. I was expecting it to be an awful day.. It ended up pretty good. I was in a good mood and really didnt think about what kind of day it was. I did bring it up to a few people but over all it was great.. Started my day very positive, had a great lunch with Jamie and then finished my day with a calm afternoon.. THANK GOODNESS my kids were in a pretty decent mood. They were pretty good. I love my daughter more than life but she is with Adam tonight and I'm kinda greatful. I have this evening to relax and just chill out.. Hey, even blog about my day and my life.. :-) Now that this day is almost over I can continue on with my healing and continue becoming a strong and a independent person.

So I am having a problem with my crazy child... See.. she has been pottied trained for many many many months... BUT for some reason she would not poop in the potty.. Here recently she has started pooping in the potty. Going on here own and coming out of the potty super excited..(its really cute). So, she will NOT poop in the potty for her daddy. He is doing all tricks that I am doing but what in the world could he be doing wrong? Why in the world is she being so stubborn for him? I guess she is just like her daddy.. LOL. So hopefully things will work out and she'll finally get the hang of it for him....